I do not regret the things I've done but those I did not do. -Lucas, Empire Records

So here's the thing: As a rule, I try my hardest not to have a lot of regrets because harboring that sort of lifelong remorse towards a particular act or words uttered in anger can bring such misery. That constant and nagging suffering can ruin you. And if you're truly weak enough, these regrets can be your demise. I've known many to fall prey to their self inflicted bitterness by way of outraged, irrational anger, the temptress we call alcohol or drugs, and in some more severe cases, even death. I've succumbed to such self deprecation myself in a bout of regret induced (and whiskey fueled) weakness. These torments are not pretty or glamorous, friends. They're terribly tragic, no matter how gorgeous Brittany Murphy, Amy Winehouse and Marilyn Monroe looked while they partook in the dangerous drug deemed regret. But there is more still... (You should well know by now that this would never be a sufficient enough rant.

The mistakes I've made are already dead to me. But I can't take back the things I never did. -Jonathan Safran Foer

No matter how hard we try, those regrets will always be there and it only takes an old Ray Charles song to have them resurface. It makes your heart hurt for a little but like one of my dearest, dearest friends always says to me when I get unbearably whiny, you "just keep living". There are those inevitable regrets, however, that aren't hurtful words flung in the heat of the moment or a short lived fragment of illicit behavior. They're the ones that could have been. The things that you opted out of because of fear or maybe because it didn't seem like the right decision at the time. In hindsight, those choices NOT made are the ones that will haunt us for the rest of our lives. The what if scenarios are by far the most injurious. Especially when there's nothing that can be done about them.

Time has a way of making things seems far away. I can't tell you how many times I've heard people say, "Do (insert awesome experience here)! I never did and will forever wish that I had. I'll always regret not doing it..." It happens to me a lot actually. I'm always wondering about those great Tory Burch metallic blue flats that got away or why I didn't speak my mind when I knew something wasn't right or why I didn't just stay in Naples and drop the tool I was dating. Or far worse, what would have happened if I had followed my dream to work for the FBI and went to DC when I was twenty?

These choices, or lack thereof, are part of the reason I don't sleep at night. It can be torture, friends. Remembering all these things and wondering why you just sat there and let the world go by. While no two stories are the same, this kind of regret lies within all of us, some deeper seated than others. It's that glimmer of untold sadness in our eye that gives us away.

If only: those must be the two saddest words in the world. -Mercedes Lackey

I once had this friend who fell for someone who was married. She would always tell me the incessant amount of guilt and regret she felt for getting involved with him, knowing that he was living something of a double life. The proverbial Jekyll and Hyde was strikingly handsome, a bit of a romantic and was unassailably good about skirting around the issue every time my girl brought it up. "All I can say is that my life can be best defined by the women I've been with," he spoke genuinely, "and the songs that remind me of them." Now you can see how my friend was so easily caught in the charmingly insolent web that was created by this legally tied man.

But soon, she realized she would always be second best to his real, true love. That she would never really amount to the woman he fell in love with and gave his name to. So she chose to walk away. And to this day, she talks about how she wonders what could have been...

Now granted, that's probably an off kilter example because marriage is a legal contract that forever combines two people. But the point still stands, friends. The regret of those things that you were blase about, those things that you just gave up on or let pass you by... those are the ones that really, really sting.

Moral of the Crazy: It sounds cliche but you are only given one life and unless you're Edward Cullen, it will go faster than a bottle of Jameson in my liquor cabinet. So make those seemingly crazy choices because even if you live to regret them, at least you'll know you tried for those things that were truly important to you. Even if only for a fraction of your lifetime.

Love hard. Try harder. And banish those regrets.

Maybe all one can do is hope to end up with the right regrets. -Arthur Miller